All things considered, it has been a good, normal weekend. Yesterday we drove to the Uintahs and went fishing at Crystal Lake (a little but breathtakingly beautiful lake). Keith got a bite, and the kids reeled in some green stuff, but we didn't leave with any fish. And once the kids (and I) stopped whining about how long it took to get there, we had a good time.
Today was a usual Sunday, we went to church, I taught my adorable girls about baptism for the dead (I love lessons like that - they always have a million questions and we get off on tangent after tangent, but they're fun tangents). After church I helped the boys build a train track with a big, big hill, then read them a couple books. I love days when I feel normal. They give me hope and remind me that all of this is temporary.
I've also been meaning to write about the results of my genetic testing. I found out at my last treatment that I have a BRAC1 deleterious mutation. That means I had an 87% chance of getting breast cancer before the age of 70. It also means that I have a 20% chance of getting ovarian cancer (would have been 44% if I didn't have breast cancer), and my doctor suggests that I have my ovaries removed when I am done having kids. So now I have to wrestle with the decision of whether or not to try for a girl. If I do have another baby, the doctor said I needed to wait at least three years after my treatment is over. What if I get ovarian cancer by then? And if I have a girl, she has a 50% chance of having the same genetic mutation. So ... very sadly ... I might be done having kids. Of course my mom and Keith want me to be done, but I still haven't decided for sure. I will have to make a decision in the coming months though. I just want to know God's will before I make such a permanent decision! I will be doing lots of praying to figure this one out...
...but you will figure it out...and knowing you, it will be selfless and exactly what Heavenly Father wants. You are very lucky to have 3 beautiful boys. I'm glad today was happy and good for you. You deserve it.
ReplyDeleteYou are lucky to have 3 boys but that would be a hard decision to make. Has you sister had that genetic testing done too? Are her chances of having the mutation really high?
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry! What a hard decision!
ReplyDeleteIf you decide to be done, you have to make your boys pinkie promise to only marry girls that you like, and then they can be like a daughter. Or you could just dress them up like girls once a year and get your fix that way! They are beautiful enough to pull it off ;)
I'm glad you were able to go on a fun outing with your famiy and have some normalcy.
If only it were easy to know God's will, then we could do it and be assured everything would turn out OK. You are so in tune to the spirit because of your trial. I know you and Keith together will figure out just what you should do. I love you and I'm thankful Keith got you for his eternal companion.
ReplyDeleteI know you, and you'll just know...maybe not right now, but you will...and it will be okay. You are my amazing friend, and your in tune with the promptings of the Spirit. You'll listen and you will be answered. Whatever the answer you are blessed...as am I to know you! ;-)
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