Last Chemo!

A large, golden, shiny bell hangs from the wall at the exit of the Utah Cancer Center for patients to ring when they are finished with their last chemo treatment. Today I got to listen to fellow cancer patients and nurses cheer as I rang that bell. I didn’t expect to be emotional about it, but I had to choke back tears of joy as I walked through the exit. My mom was waiting for me in her car outside of the building, and when I got in her car she burst into tears from the sight of her daughter walking out of a cancer center wearing a scarf on her head. I wrapped my arms around her and reassured her that everything was going to be okay, and she reassured me in return.

I have made it through the most grueling, difficult four months of my life! And I am a changed person because of it. I don’t take anything for granted anymore - life, health, and family are priceless blessings. I have grown in patience, faith, and compassion. And I have learned to trust God, to “be still, and know that he is God,” to humbly submit to his will and believe that no matter what happens, we are in his hands, and all experiences will be for our good.

I am completely filled with gratitude right now. On my to-do list is written “write thank-you notes to everyone.” It seems like an insurmountable task, because there are so many people who have helped us these last few months.

I still have a few surgeries and radiation to get through, but after going through chemo, I feel like I can get through anything. The next step is a bilateral mastectomy, which will probably be in about three weeks. I am meeting with the surgeon on Monday to go over the details and to schedule the surgery. Wish me luck and keep me in your prayers!